Club IDIC - A Short-Lived Safe Space
written by Heather Leigh Cameron
It's Disability Pride Month and and I believe the whole concept of Pride is to bring attention to struggles faced by a marginalized community in hopes of inviting positive changes.
One of the challenges faced by people with disabilities is finding safe spaces where they can truly feel safe.
It's a struggle to find that safe space more often than not, so many who are able to create a safe space for themselves will often do so, but there is a struggle involved in that because not everyone believes that everyone has a right to a space that they can consider safe.
I am a person with neurodevelopmental disabilities, specifically ADHD and Non-Verbal Learning Disorder, which is on the autism spectrum and it's always been hard to find spaces where I am welcome, as a lot of people find it hard to love me as I am enough to want me around, so I get asked to leave a lot of spaces.
And that brings me to my story about Club IDIC, a virtual space that I created because it was hard for me to find spaces in the Trek fandom where my authentic self was actually welcome.
On September 11, 2021, I founded a virtual Star Trek Club called Club IDIC and established it as a virtual club where diverse Star Trek gatherings, watch parties, and discussions take place! I even designed a logo that showed the club to be a stairway to the safety and inclusion that I tried to promote in Club IDIC.
It brought me joy, and I worked to bring joy to others like me who sought for a safe space to belong.
How did Club IDIC come to be?
Back in February 2021, I (Heather Leigh Cameron) had a piece published by StarTrek.com called 'IDIC Includes Me And That's Why Star Trek Matters' that talked about my life as a Neurodivergent individual and the struggles I have had in my life because of it.
The sequel to that article, 'Star Trek Teaches Us That We Must Not Forget To Care' was published by Star Trek fanzine Star Trek Quarterly in September 2021 and highlighted my struggles even further, including the continuous struggle I have with finding places to belong socially.
Since it was hard for me to find a place in the virtual world where I was welcome, I made my own place and named it after the essay I made, hence the name Club IDIC.
With presences on Facebook, Twitter, and Discord, Club IDIC was a Safe Space where Trekkies are welcome to belong and thrive!
The rules were very simple and straightforward: the club had no space for bigotry, racism, homophobia, transphobia, ableism, sexism, or hate speech. I am a Neurodivergent Trekkie who has struggled finding spaces where I am welcome, so I made a Safe Space where I can belong and where other Trekkies can also belong.
I have spent many years of my life feeling alone, forgotten, or left exiled because people forgot to care or understand me enough to love me, and I don't want others to have that feeling. Hence, I created a place where nobody will be forgotten.
The first meeting of Club IDIC was held on September 17, 2021.
With the consent of those present, I recorded our Club IDIC discussions and then after each meeting was over, I edited the discussions into episodes that I dubbed the 'Club IDIC Chronicles', and I posted them on YouTube/social media so that everyone can know what we do at Club IDIC.
Episodes of the 'Club IDIC Chronicles' can still be viewed on my YouTube Channel: The Stormin' Latter-Day Saint.
A total of 48 episodes were made in the time that Club IDIC was alive and each episode of the Club IDIC Chronicles focused on a different Star Trek episode.
Episode 1 - Exploring PTSD Through Star Trek DS9's Soldiers of the Empire!
'Soldiers of the Empire' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 2 - Exploring How 'Star Trek Teaches Us That We Must Not Forget To Care.'
'Past Tense, Part I' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 3 - The Impacts of Forgetting to Care.
'Past Tense: Part II' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 4 - Caregivers and Caregiver Stress.
'The Wire' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 5 - Unexpected Opportunities.
'Carbon Creek' from Star Trek: Enterprise.
Episode 6 - How Do Our Origins Affect Our Lives?
'Ensign Ro' from Star Trek: The Next Generation.
Episode 7 - Remembering the Sacrifices Involved in Battles and Wars.
'Balance of Terror' from Star Trek: The Original Series.
Episode 8 - Overcoming Barriers.
'Minefield' from Star Trek: Enterprise.
Episode 9 - IDIC Includes Me.
'Dr. Bashir, I Presume?' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 10 - Be Not Ashamed of Yourself.
'Lineage' from Star Trek: Voyager.
Episode 11 - Gifts of Life and Love.
'The Gift from Star Trek Voyager.
Episode 12 - Club IDIC's Virtual Gratitude Festival!
'Fascination' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 13 - Meeting The First Starship Enterprise!
'Broken Bow' from Star Trek: Enterprise.
Episode 14 - Learning to Live With Change.
'Emissary' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 15 - Remembering What Was Lost.
'Children of Mars' from Star Trek: Short Treks.
'Remembrance' from Star Trek Picard.
Episode 16 - Having My Own Personal 'Delta Quadrant Experience.'
'Caretaker' from Star Trek Voyager.
Episode 17 - Being The Dreamer And The Dream.
'Far Beyond The Stars' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 18 - Coming Together In Chaotic Matrimony!
'You Are Cordially Invited' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 19 - Disability Does Not Mean Inability.
'Melora' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 20 - Blessed Be The Divergent Minds.
'Data's Day' from Star Trek: The Next Generation.
Episode 21 - Do Choices Change A Destiny?
'Yesterday's Enterprise' from Star Trek: The Next Generation.
Episode 22 - Using Time Travel To Save Lives.
'Trials and Tribble-ations' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 23 - Friendships That Go Beyond Time.
'Time's Arrow, Part I' from Star Trek: The Next Generation.
Episode 24 - Saving Humanity!
'Star Trek: First Contact.'
Episode 25 - The Dark Side of Exploration.
'Terra Nova' from Star Trek: Enterprise.
Episode 26 - The First Caretaker.
'Shore Leave' from Star Trek: The Original Series.
Episode 27 - Meeting A New Member Of The Family.
'Scorpion' from Star Trek: Voyager.
Episode 28 - Being Isolated and Facing Death.
'Shuttlepod One' from Star Trek: Enterprise.
Episode 29 - Life In and After Captivity.
'Hard Time' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 30 - Fighting For Freedom.
'By Inferno's Light' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 31 - Returning to Life After War.
'It's Only A Paper Moon' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 32 - Learning to Remember.
'Conundrum' from Star Trek: The Next Generation.
Episode 33 - Learning to Overcome.
'Redemption, Part II' from Star Trek: The Next Generation.
Episode 34 - Learning to Survive.
'Measure of a Man' from Star Trek: The Next Generation.
Episode 35 - The Process of Discovery.
'Time's Arrow: Part II' from Star Trek: The Next Generation.
Episode 36 - The Gateway to Chaos.
'The City on the Edge of Forever' from Star Trek: The Original Series.
Episode 37 - Impersonating Darkness.
'Mirror, Mirror' from Star Trek: The Original Series.
Episode 38 - A Crusade For Truth.
'Wrongs Darker Than Death Or Night' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 39 - Rising Above Trauma.
Revisiting 'Soldiers of the Empire' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 40 - Lost in the Depths of Imagination.
'Distant Voices' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 41 - Facing A Strange New World
'Strange New Worlds' from Star Trek: Strange New Worlds.
Episode 42: Looking Back To Move Forward
'Kobayashi' from Star Trek: Prodigy.
Episode 43 - Learning to Move Beyond Tolerance
'The Storyteller' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 44 - Unreasonable Judgments
'Shadows of P'Jem' from Star Trek: Enterprise.
Episode 45 - Journeys Into Motherhood
'The Child' from Star Trek: The Next Generation.
Episode 46 - Developing Relationships
'Sons and Daughters' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Episode 47 - Communication is Important
'Twovix' from Star Trek: Lower Decks.
Episode 48 - A Special Second Chance
'Shattered Mirror' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
I worked very hard to make sure everyone felt welcome and even created a Facebook group where members could gather together and enjoy each other's company.
In the group, I'd make event posts, discussion posts, club contests, spaces for art and fan fiction, and really tried to be a good 'caretaker' to the many who would gather in my environment so that everyone could feel like they belonged in a world that struggled to accept them.
Unfortunately for me, not everyone I thought was a good fit to the club had the best intentions regarding it. They wanted things a specific way and were not open to other ways of doing things. My attempts to communicate with other members became battlefields when those members mocked me, disputed me, and even talked down to me even when I showed them nothing but care. I gave my trust to a lot of people who had made me feel like I could trust them and their want to help me create a space where the diversity in Star Trek could be celebrated, but it was my mistake to be so trusting. I learned that the hard way when people subtly mentioned using their government jobs to do background checks on me and anyone else who was associated with the club and when they also called me out for not being respectful to all facets of diversity even though I worked to include everyone in event planning and episode discussions. And then they eventually stopped coming and I later learned that they either took my ideas to improve their own space or hung out in my space only to spy on me and make fun of me and my 'weak efforts' among their friends/groups. I was deeply and continually bullied over my work and many people I thought I could trust told a lot of lies about me and my character across the wide world of social media to the point where my credibility in the fandom and my group was absolutely destroyed. I've had to live with it and their lack of accountability. They took advantage of my disability-related struggles and my kindness and desire to include everyone and ripped me to shreds over it because I couldn't meet their standard of what 'being inclusive' was. I also tried to set boundaries and that made them trash me even more. I didn't even know all of this behind-the-back talk was happening until I got an email informing me that others were advertising my club as a safe that was anything but safe. I also found out on Twitter/X that people were trashing me, my character, and the club as an unsafe space.
I did try to set boundaries and ask people to let me have my space and the joy I felt with it, but my pleas were ignored and I was made to look evil. People literally tagged me in piles of social media posts and had others make posts making themselves look like the victim and me the unforgiving, unteachable villain.
I keep collections of screenshots and emails from those days to remind me not to be so easy to trust in the future. It reminds me that people responded so rapidly and maliciously to what they heard about me instead of considering my character and the good I had attempted to do. I don't want to post all of them here, but I will post a few to ensure the message is understood: a beautiful space that I worked hard to make inclusive and safe for everyone was damaged because I had a naive belief that all those who claimed to love the concept of IDIC actually worked to find joy in diversity and in anyone who promoted IDIC. I was very foolish. All I saw was that people are happy to support IDIC endeavours as long as their own work isn't threatened. The moment those others have their own success threatened, they seek to do whatever they can to lift themselves...even if it means they step on other people, destroy the work of others, and leave others in pain.
I did try to resurrect interest in the club, but everyone's gone and hardly anyone in that fandom really sees me as a person worthy of love anymore. I know I'm still talked about negatively, as I have tried to connect with smaller groups since then, but everyone has kept their distance and it's been a very lonely time for me and my constant attempts to try and fit into a fandom that struggles to actually love inclusion. I just felt the need to be vulnerable about this because it continues to follow me I am still haunted by people who refuse to see the good in me and what I do because they'd rather believe lies created by people I had to set boundaries with.
This chaos has left me on an island and while I live on my island, I ask myself repeatedly: does IDIC really include me or am I just saying it does in hopes that enough people will hear it and believe it?
I have found a bit of comfort in my writing - my essays centered around the importance of including those who are like me and even my Star Trek fanfiction, stories that include people who are like me and strive to find joy in spaces that aren't necessarily kind to them. Club IDIC is at rest for now. Maybe someday, I'll revive it, as there is so much Star Trek out there that is yet to be explored, but for now, I will at least teach people about the club and about the pride I had in it.
I feel as if the topic of safe spaces is very much worth exploring because people really don't take the time to consider such an intense social topic and I invite all to explore, enjoy, and become educated by my post and everything involved in it.
Sadly, Club IDIC only lived from 2021 to 2024 due to the circumstances I already mentioned.
While it was alive, however, Club IDIC did its best to serve the Star Trek fandom as a safe space where people gathered, watch Star Trek episodes, talk Trek, and explore diversity, intersectionality, and enjoy community.
For now, Club IDIC is at rest because I don't currently feel like people would attend the meetings if I made them available. Maybe someday, I'll revive it, as there is so much Star Trek out there that is yet to be explored, but for now, I will at least teach people about the club and about the pride I had in it.
In the meantime, I invite all to read the rise, the life, and the fall of the safe space I tried to create so Trekkies could have a safe space where they could have pride in themselves, their existence, and their love for Star Trek.
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